ANGER AND VIOLENCE IN MARRIAGE: THE DUTY OF REASONING BEFORE ACTION. Written by KEMKA S. IBEJI

Marriage loses its meaning the moment a husband or wife lifts his or her hand against the partner. The question before that should be; what is marriage and what's the import of love in it?

I pray each day that no matter my sins, God should please let me live sane.

Again, please what's the essence of beating someone? A child, student, or ward is beaten for correction. Even at some point, it's useless and meaningless to beat for correction.

Let's also accept that beating is punishment. But again, why do we punish? What is the reason for punishment if not to correct except for capital punishment? All punishments are for either incapacitation, deterrence, retribution, protection, restoration, rehabilitation, reformation, reparation or restitution.

In the foregoing are also found the reason for death sentence. If no punishment is reasonable enough to deter the offender, protect the society, rehabilitate, retribute, restitute and recompense for the offence, then such offence can be validly be classified as capital and so attract capital responsibility - death sentence.

But for God's sake, what offence can a husband or wife commit to/or against his or her partner when loss of life is nonexistent that will warrant killing the other? And even if such offence exists, why take laws into your hands? Why take life you are incapable of creating?

It is really sad the increasing circumstances of partners taking the life of their other halves. This is not only condemnable but has to quickly treated as social malaise orchestrated and occasioned by the highest form of ignorance and lack of knowledge.

You kill your partner because he or she cheated and after a few years you go ahead to either remarry or have a new relationship as such? If you loved the man or woman so much that you cannot live to allow such, you should understand that your life has lost its meaning. Nobody is worth your life for being unreasonable.

But if you must think again, it is very logical to ask yourself, if you must condemn someone for making a mistake, have you ever made a mistake? If you cannot cohabit for certain reason, the best action is to separate and not to take another person's life.

A husband or wife is a mature person whose type of correction is no longer within the realms of beating. There are other ways of correcting or even punishing your spouse or whoever else that is mature and not beating. It is important to allude here to a philosophical saying that states; whoever kills his or her kind has lost the essence of that species. So if you kill your fellow human being, you have ceased to be human and are at best a beast. Just as a threatening beast is hunted down, you are supposed to be shot at sight.

In the main, anger and the likes are the features we share with lower animals but what distinguishes humans from the lower animals is reasoning and the engagement of the intellect. So at any point you wish to take any action, take a breath and make an employ of your intellect. Do not act when you are emotional because you are bound to be irrational, unreasonable and illogical. Always ensure that you call your intellect to work whenever you find yourself emotionally attempting to perform an action. It is always better to delay action than to commit murder.